“Here I come to save the day!” has been my motto for as long
as I can remember. Assuming responsibility
for another’s thoughts, feelings, and needs is often an exhausting and frustrating
experience. Temporarily I may feel
relief and the person I rescued may be pacified, but it is only a very brief
respite before the next catastrophe arises.
Today, I recognize my attempts at fixing and helping often end up creating
a sense of shame, criticism, and blame, not to mention, stripping the other person of a sense of self-empowerment. I choose to manage my own fears and need for
control and refrain from giving uninvited or unwelcome ‘help’ or advice. When someone asks for my help, I will
remember that I have a right to say yes or no and that choosing to set a
boundary is not only respectful but a caring way to send a message of “I
believe in you.” I will keep my feet
firmly planted on my own path and give myself permission to be “self-full”.
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