VISUALIZE ABUNDANCE

Visualize unlimited abundance.  This is a daily practice that is necessary in order to stay away from my ever-present scarcity beliefs.  I learned from an early age that there wasn’t enough; enough time, money, attention, love…just enough to survive.  I grew up believing that I didn’t have the right to want more and I should be happy with what I had.  I also thought perhaps I didn’t deserve more; somehow I’d internalized a self-imposed punishment for not ‘being enough’.  If I was enough my parents would be happy and stop drinking, I wouldn’t be abandoned and left alone, my siblings wouldn’t hurt so much.  Eventually, these belief systems overwhelmed me and I had to do a jail break from them or completely give up.  Although they are still back ground music in my day at times, I can now easily turn down the volume or turn the power off.  I have come to recognize the distortion of these thoughts and chosen not to buy into them any longer.

I can now open my hands and heart to receive the unlimited resource that surrounds me.  I choose to focus on having my needs met and acknowledge with gratitude the abundance that pours into my life.  When fear of scarcity rears its head and tells me to hold on to what I have with grasping hands; I will remind myself gently that I can release these old beliefs and trust the loving, generous and supportive universe that embraces me.  I intend to visualize limitless abundance today.

FORGIVENESS

A friend recently posted a story I found very touching. 

"Two friends who were walking through the desert and at some point of the journey had an argument.  One friend slapped the other one in the face.  The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything wrote in the sand:   “Today my best friend slapped me in the face.”  They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath.  The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.  After he recovered from the near drowning he wrote on a stone: “Today my best friend saved my life.”  The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, “After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on stone, why?”  The other friend replied “When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away.  But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.”

I wish to engrave on my heart the many moments of friendship, caring and kindness that I encounter today.  The times when hurt or pain surface, throughout this day, I choose to envision as bits of sand that may irritate and frustrate me, knowing that eventually they will be forgiven, blown away, and forgotten.   I am grateful for the paradigm shift this story offers.

   

STEERING MY WAY THROUGH THE DAY

As I move through this day I will remember that I am not responsible for anyone’s happiness but my own.  This doesn’t mean that I won’t express compassion, generosity, or kindness to others.  However, I will not take on the burden of people pleasing at my own expense.  I will comfort the younger part of myself that quite often becomes guilt-ridden and believes she is obligated to take care of others’ problems.  I will give her permission to let go and remind her that she may be listening to old worn-out mind tapes that can now be safely discarded.  Just as no one else is responsible for my fixing my feelings or rescuing me from my struggles, I can also release myself from trying to take on troubles that aren’t intended for me.    

Today, I choose to focus on my own needs and take responsibility for my own feelings, needs, and behaviors. No one is 'me-er' than me.  I will express care, concern, and love for those I encounter without stripping them of their own accountability.

TODAY'S DANCE

Time goes so quickly at times.  There’s barely a chance to savor a moment.  I guess this is a good thing to remember when it seems as though time is crawling forward.  I want to take time to breathe and enjoy the 86,400 moments of this day.  I will remind myself to remain aware of the sacredness of encounter, the spaciousness of an open heart, the stillness of being centered and the joyfulness of moving with today’s dance.

MORE THAN ENOUGH

Kindness and abundance surrounds me if I only allow myself to see it.  Focusing on what isn’t going the way I want it to go often entrenches me in beliefs about scarcity and limitation.  Not enough resources, not enough love, not enough time, not enough me, not enough you, not enough …  When I dwell in the land of limitation, I begin to make excuses for myself and others, I become resentful and jealous, and I feel scared and needy.    I have already spent enough time stuck in scarcity, now is the time to break free.

Today, I choose to reflect on how much the universe supports my being.  I will notice the kindness of those around me, the tender grace-filled moments I encounter, the possibilities and options for choice I have, the many people who are put in my path to love, support, and teach me, the acceptance and joy of friendships.  I may not have everything I want but I definitely have what I need.  There is more than enough...

STAYING SAFELY CONNECTED

It is safe to discard old defenses that no longer serve me.  Isolating and withdrawing to keep from being hurt only perpetuates loneliness and distrust of others.  This may have been useful when I was unable to set boundaries or protect myself from those in my life.  However, now I can now set boundaries and separate myself from those who wound me.  I can speak up and clarify misunderstandings that are offensive.  I can give myself permission to say no and choose to connect with people I trust and love. 

 

When I feel the old defensive movement to push away inside me today, I will take stock of what is triggering me, ascertain whether or not I am safe, reassure and comfort myself, reinforce any necessary boundaries, breathe, and remain present.  I will not run away from encounters or relationships just because there is discord.  I choose to stay safely connected.

DEALING WITH CRITICISM

When given information that I don’t measure up to another’s standards I have a few options.

·       I can pack up my toys and go home, shutting the door on further connection. 

·       I can become defensive and blame you; point the finger and start a feud.

·       I can consider what’s said and decide whether or not the feedback is helpful to me.  Perhaps I’m being invited to grow and expand myself and although it’s uncomfortable it might be worth exploring. 

·       I can evaluate the criticism and choose to respond assertively, expressing what I think, feel and need.  Perhaps clearing up misunderstanding and hurt and increasing the possibility of acceptance and support.

Today, I have the resources to step away from reactivity and make a conscious, deliberate choice.  I will take my time responding and allow myself the opportunity to evaluate your disapproval.  I choose to build bridges, to find creative solutions, and to open doors.  I am strong enough to listen and keep my heart open.

BEING IMPERFECT

Mistakes can be doors to growth and new learning or doors to defeat and giving up.  The determining factor is my attitude:  will I accept my vulnerability and remain open to change or will I become defensive and rigid?  When I was younger I learned to hide and deny mistakes in order to stay safe.  I was taught to see them as shameful and dangerous, something to be avoided at all costs.  In order to be accepted I came to live out of the illusion of perfectionism.  I sat in judgment of myself and others, filled with expectations and 'shoulds', fearful of taking risks or rocking the boat.  No more.

I no longer need to be so careful and protective of myself.  I can allow myself permission to explore and try new things, to be spontaneous and creative, to stumble, get up and try again.  Through my errors and falls I learn to improve, change, trust and grow.  My worth and value flows from my 'being' not my 'doing' and my being is never wrong.  Today when I make mistakes I will breathe, accept my imperfection, embrace, comfort and reassure myself.  It is okay for me to be wonderful, imperfect me and for you to be imperfect you.  There is room for both of us to change and grow.  What a relief!

TAKING MY TIME

 I can listen and be present as this day unfolds.  Should I feel overwhelmed by circumstances that occur or demands that are made on me, I will take a moment to breathe and center myself.  I will remember I am not responsible for fixing everyone or everything around me and will let go of taking responsibility for outcomes.  I will do my best to remain present and take action from a place of internal integrity and honesty.  I refuse to play games, manipulate or attempt to control others.  There is no need to rush or over-react to others' drama.  I can take my time and trust my own process. 

 

LOOKING WITHIN

“Looking behind I am filled with gratitude, Looking forward I am filled with vision,
  Looking upwards I am filled with strength, Looking within I discover peace.  
                                                                                                                        Apache prayer

It is so inviting to look outwards for answers and expect others to hold the key to my happiness.  Blaming comes much easier than taking responsibility, making you the problem means I don’t have to change or challenge myself.  Unfortunately at the end of this road lies disrupted relationship, anger, victimization, hurt, and resentment. 

Today I choose to look within where I can discover peace, promise and find empowerment.  I will hold myself accountable for the choices I make, the things I do or don’t do this day.  I will look towards my higher power for reassurance and hope.  And at the end of the day I will give thanks for the blessings I have encountered and the love experienced and shared.  I will face tomorrow with courage resting in the vision of possibility and connection.

ASKING FOR WHAT I NEED

I can ask for help when I need it even though it is difficult to receive without giving in return.  Many past beliefs have limited me from allowing others to show their love for me.  When I was younger I learned to be independent and self-reliant.  I was rewarded for my sense of responsibility and taking care of others’ needs.  I unconsciously denied my own needs and became hyper vigilant of what those around me needed, sometimes giving them what they required even before they had voiced a desire or had a chance to react.  This kept me safe and maintained balance.  Unfortunately, through this early rescuer role training, I became unaware of my own needs and often have allowed myself to become physically sick or fallen into the role of ‘victim martyr’ when others haven’t seen my needs the way I see theirs. 

 Today, I give myself permission to receive without giving.  I will reach out and let others know when I need assistance rather than waiting for them to magically just know my needs.  There is no shame in having needs or in requesting support when it is necessary.  I no longer have to wait until I become immobilized to ask for help.  I can say what I need and if the person I ask isn’t available then I will ask someone else without guilt or concern about whether I’m taking too much.  I will remind myself that I am usually more than willing to give to those I care for and more than likely my friends are eager to do the same for me (IF I ASK).

 

RECEIVING COMPLIMENTS

I can allow myself to take in my successes and receive compliments.  It is so easy to minimize or down play the wonderful things I am told about myself.  I quickly shift the focus to someone or something else and often dismiss what is being said by making excuses for what I didn’t do, completing brushing off what you tell me.  I learned at a younger age that being the center of attention carried a heavy price, so avoiding the limelight is natural to me.  I would rather blend in to the wall and not be noticed.  It feels much safer.

However, today I am able to boldly stand out and allow myself to be celebrated.  I can remain grounded and present.  I am in no danger and it feels good to be told I have worth and value.  I can open my heart, receive the kind words of others and let myself believe that I am loved and respected. 

STAYING GROUNDED

Drama, drama, drama! Some days it seems to be everywhere.  Friends badmouthing other friends, betrayal, unhappiness, disrespect, judgment, broken hearts; it is easy to begin to sink beneath the negativity and discontent encountered in a 24 hour period.  On the other hand, in spite of horrific circumstances it is also possible to find resiliency, creativity, forgiveness, responsible action, compassion, empowerment, courage, and honesty. 

Today I choose to remain grounded and to look for the moments of optimism, encouragement, growth, and joy.  In the midst of chaos, rather than feeding into the poison of ‘negativity’, I will offer affirmation, comfort, care and hope to myself and others.  Step away from the drama!

SELF ACCEPTANCE

Today I choose to relax and stop working so hard to be accepted by others.  There is no need to prove I am of worth and value by people pleasing and overworking.  This only wears me out and prevents me from being who I really am.  I will open my arms to myself and speak words of self-acceptance to the doubting, tired, unsure parts of myself. 

·       You are enough. 

·       You can trust yourself.  

·       You are loved and respected by those who know you. 

·       You don’t need acceptance from everyone to be okay.

·       Just because someone disagrees with you doesn’t make you wrong or bad.

·       It’s okay to make waves and say no sometimes. 

·       You can be who you are.

  I will embrace myself and an open heart and move into this day filled with confidence, comfort, and reassurance. 

KEEPING AN OPEN MIND

It is so hard to keep an open mind and not judge.  Someone says or does something and immediately I assign meaning to it.  I draw conclusions, make assumptions, and then often have knee jerk responses based on unconscious or ambiguous beliefs.  I forget that opinions are not facts and that there are many interpretations to any one event. 

Today I will remember to check out my perceptions and make sure I have received the intended message and not an imagined meaning.  I will take time to breathe and reflect before I respond, clarifying my own intention and communicating my perspective assertively.  I choose to connect and understand rather than fight and protect.  I am safe now and can approach our encounter grounded and centered in the knowledge that we both have a right to our own opinions and experiences.  I no longer have to be right.  There is enough space for me to accept and respect you even if we disagree with each other.  I will open my mind to listen and understand.

DECISION MAKING

Today I will slow down and make well thought out, informed decisions.  I will not allow myself to rush into choices made from a place of impulsive urge and then have to deal with shame and  regret.  I also refuse to become overwhelmed by too much information or agonize over possible outcomes and paralyzed myself with the anxiety of ‘what if’s.  If I do, I usually end up choosing by the default of not making a choice.    

I can take my time to think things over, explore options, ask for input and clarify misunderstanding.  I can breathe and allow myself to listen to my heart, examine my goals, and be guided by the principles I believe in.  I will make one choice at a time and take it easy.

SILVER LININGS

Life throws us curve balls some days and they aren’t always easy to catch.  Sometimes I just want to wish them away or pretend they aren’t there, but denial never seems to work very well and it doesn't change the facts.  Other times, I drop the ball and it takes some getting used to when I finally pick it up.  I would like to be the controller of the balls I’m thrown, but unfortunately that’s not possible.  However, I do get to choose what I will do with them once I catch them, so I am not a victim of circumstances.  I may feel disappointment, let down and experience setbacks but it isn’t the end of the game yet.

Today I will remember the many times I have learned more from my challenges than from my successes.  I can accept disappointment because I have unlimited hope.  I am an optimistic, adaptable, creative person.  I can face this day with optimism, letting go of my expectations while keeping a firm grasp on a belief in my adequacy and ‘silver linings’.

I CAN RELAX

I will breathe and relax, even if it wastes time.  Taking care of myself is never a misuse of time.  The old messages that tell me to hurry up, try harder, and please others rather than myself have guided me long enough.  I no longer choose to be directed by distortions of the truth and fear of rejection and failure.  I will step back, reduce my stress, and exhale, knowing that I deserve to be cared for and valued by myself and others.  Today is filled with precious moments and I am grateful for each and every one. 

 

DETERMINATION

When I set my mind on a goal I can achieve it.  I have had determination, perseverance, and single-minded focus in the past and I have it now.  I will remind myself of this as I face the challenges ahead.  Although I may not always be able to control what happens, I can choose not to be defeated or reduced.  Today I choose to move forward with an attitude of hope, gratitude, and purpose.  As I face the choices of this day I will remember my goal and have confidence in my dreams.