Thursday, January 23, 2014

Authenticity


Being ME can be difficult when I’m frightened.  There are many camouflages I find myself using to handle my scare.  Sometimes, I shrink down in size and blend in so I don’t stand out.  At other times, I become bigger than I feel and over-exaggerate who I am in order to impress and get others to back off.  Occasionally, I will become confrontational and argumentative to defend myself.  I also can try to paint myself as pitiful and uncomprehending to avoid taking accountability.  Once in a while, I become very helpful and rush around trying to fix everything to keep peace at all costs.  These behaviors take so much energy and tire me out.  They also prevent others from really knowing me and sometimes even alienate me from my own awareness of self. 

 

Today, I will recognize when I am using any of these behaviors.  I will take time to explore what I feel and need.  I will choose to affirm, comfort, or nurture myself with reassurance of my enough-ness.  It is safe to be ME, I can abandon my defenses and connect with others as the authentic person I am.   If I notice you using these behaviors, I will release my judgments and recognize how scary it is to just be real.  I will reach out my hand in friendship and hope to meet you, being you, in the middle.


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