Breathing

Pause, breathe, and be mindful of being alive in this moment.  Presence begins in my own body; noticing the rhythm of my breath flowing in and out, scanning the tightness of muscles and relaxing, observing the chatter of my thoughts and gently refocusing my attention, opening my heart to the beginning of this day.   

As I am rooted in the ground of my own being, I offer mindful presence to those who flow in and out of this day’s encounters. 

  

Facing Adventure

I release the ghosts from the past that echo in my mind today with judging “you should haves” and wishful “if onlys.”  Nothing can be gained by holding on to resentment, blame or self-pity.  It is what it is.  The experiences of my past have served the purpose of teaching me how to make more informed, different choices today.  I am no longer the same person I was then.  I can let it go and live this present moment.

I surrender the threatening images of future harm that flood my brain with ‘what ifs’ and paralyze me with anxiety.  I have the grace and strength to face today, it’s impossible to imagine or even know the resources, creativity and possibility I will possess tomorrow.  Perhaps it will be dependent on what I learn from this day.  If I continue to focus on the future, I will miss the opportunity to grow stronger today.  I am safe enough for now.  I can let go and be here and now.

I place the ceaseless busyness of agendas and expectations aside for now.  I could allow myself to swirl around in the distraction of meaningless activity and mindless action.  However, I choose to find the still, quiet space of this moment and breathe into it.  Grounded and centered I stand with courage, authenticity and purpose.  What an adventure it is to be alive and present today.

What Do I Lose When I Rescue?

When I give help, offer advice, and overdo for others without stopping to consider whether my assistance is needed or wanted, I may be engaging in rescuing behavior.  When I feel a need to be useful so that I’ll be accepted, loved and given approval, it’s probably coming from a place of rescuer.  When I allow another person to take advantage of me, struggle with saying no, or keep my thoughts and feelings to myself in order to not rock the boat and maintain peace, I’m certainly being a rescuer.  What do I lose by denying the costs of these behaviors?

I lose the opportunity to experience being loved and accepted for who I am rather than what I do.  At some level, when I rescue, I believe I'm earning the love of another and deserve it.  When I don't get what I expect, I can become resentful.  I also believe that I might be abandoned or pushed aside if I don't prove my worth and value to you.  I might tell myself you’d suffer if I didn’t help you, but perhaps on a deeper level I believe you wouldn’t want to be with me if I didn’t help you.   I miss out on trusting in the freely given gift of your love and commitment to me. What a big loss.

Today, I choose to surrender this fear of abandonment and trust that I am a person of worth and value.  There is no need to prove my worth; I can relax and accept the gift of love you offer me.  Even if you have a temper tantrum when I set a boundary, I will calm my fear of being alone and quiet the impulse to give in to you.  I will remind myself that I deserve to be respected, cherished, and loved for the treasure that I am and you deserve the opportunity to empower yourself.

I Am Limited

I am limited and need boundaries.  It’s a fact of life I like to deny.  At times, I can overwork, overspend, overeat, over express, over care, over react, overdo ‘it’ and end up suffering the consequences from my failure to self-regulate.  Most often, my lack of balance is due to moving mindlessly through the day.

Today, I choose to mindfully recognize when a limit would be helpful.  I will remain aware of my body and the valuable information it is giving me.  I will listen to my heart and take time to hear what I need.  I will pay attention to others reactions to my behavior and notice when there is disconnect.  Rather than avoiding or denying what I discover, I will acknowledge it and take some type of action to alleviate the stress.  Setting limits for me increases my empowerment rather than diminishing it.  Saying no to me at times can really be about saying yes.